After sleeping for 2354 hours this afternoon, I reread the last few chapters of Snicket’s The End. As I expected, all I want to do now is slouch around, weeping about the scene when the siblings are reading the Book underneath the tuberous canopy. And eat Girl Scout cookies. 

Instead, I have to stay in the library forever, trying to survive the first world problem of not having a laptop for at least a week. 

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